Loading
516-822-1020 dennis@dennishaber.com

The Coronavirus is One Problem-The War Between Your Negative & Positive Self-Talk Is The Other

As the mental and physical restraint from the Coronavirus plays out, you probably feel that you have lost control over your life. Through no fault of yours’, you have lost your salary and /or income, your freedom to travel, your freedom to enjoy family, your independence, and painfully, you have no answers to important questions.

Your negative self-talk (NST) reminds you that you couldn’t succeed, no matter the situation. You beat yourself up- POW, take that you lazy thing. POW, look at all the opportunities you didn’t take advantage of. POW, how many more times are you going to try to hug the wind? The NST is enjoying every minute of this. Its main purpose is to keep you reacting to things. It wants to prevent you from knowing that you have the power to create your life.

However, compelling circumstances  are forcing you to rethink things and beat back the NST. You’re looking at your current situation and reasoning just maybe I could have done more to secure my financial position and done more to create the life I wanted to have. The dire existential consequences have caused a deep wound of vulnerability to manifest itself. The on-going battle being fought between your positive self-talk (PST)and your NST has caused mental fatigue.

It is  an epic battle between WHAT IF(What I should have done) and WHAT NOW (oops… so what’s next). The NST does not even want you to think about such things. It does not want you to gain wisdom. It would much prefer that you remain in the dark. Your NST is the intractable enemy. In misaligned soothing tones, it’s telling you that things are not up to you. It’s like listening to Calm Radio on the internet- Station K-OAS. It’s playing catchy tunes like IT’S NEVER MY FAULT, THEY’RE WRONG I’M RIGHT and who can forget BLAME EVERYONE ELSE. Refusing to acknowledge responsibility is the overriding theme of the NST’s playbook.

Nevertheless, out of abject despair, questions are being asked. Your PST is trying to have a voice. It’s forcing you to ask important questions that should be considered. WHAT IF I had improved my needed skill-sets? WHAT IF I had improved important relationships in crisis at a time of crisis? WHAT IF I had made better decisions along the way? There is a vast difference between being employed and being employable. The WHAT NOW is the counter-pull from the PST as it fights back. The WHAT NOW is the mind trying to figure out how things should now be handled.

The NST, particularly now, is emphatically trying to convince you that whatever you are facing is your fault. PST is telling you it’s time to think in new bolder ways. It’s not about fault. It’s about perspective. Your big idea is to maintain(NST). Now that seems like  a comforting thought. However, it should be about abandoning (PST) and thinking differently. Your big idea is not to lose ground(NST). You believe that going a bit backwards is OK. The thoughts should be about being propelled  forwards(PST).

Life is not about what your circumstances are, nor about who you were told you are. Life is about who you want to be. Transformation takes place when YOU HAVE HAD ENOUGH; when you have the will and the power to beat back that dastardly NST. That will  happen when DESIRE comes bubbling up inside of you and overwhelms that enemy. DESIRE is much like the difference between water at 211 degrees and 212 degrees. Your NST is trying to keep your temperature below 212 degrees, so YOUR THOUGHTS can’t be energized. PST is encouraging you one hundred percent, so new ideas can reach the magical 212 degrees and boil over to drown out the NST.

 

 

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Sign Up To Receive Free Dennis Haber Content

Get Instant Access to a free chapter of Don’t Play With Fire and a Workbook!

  • This field is for validation purposes and should be left unchanged.

Latest Posts

You Have The Power To Be Great-Do You Have The Guts?
Once there was a boy who had enough aspirations to fill two lives. While he was growing up, television was
Read more.
Stop Your Stinkin Thinkin and Start Thinking A Better Way
Why is it that no matter your age and maturity, you still make bad choices and bad decisions? Gosh, I
Read more.
When “Failure” Wins, You Lose
Once upon a time, failure was really looked upon as an event, and only an event. It clocked in as
Read more.
Secured By miniOrange